Questions about addiction for drugs, alcohol, and all other impulse control behaviors: food, gambling, compulsive sex, codependency, computer and video game addiction...
When you have a problem, it’s often hard to reach out - – particularly if you have an issue with any addictive behavior. With any addictive behavior, there is a feeling of embarrassment. Let's face it, you don't want to share this struggle with all your friends.
It always seems that everyone else is living a 'normal' life and so what's wrong with you?
If you are a parent or family member there is the added pressure. You ask yourself questions. What can I do to help? Or where did I go wrong? The immediate response is to 'fix it'. And of course, what should you do?
The media and society doesn't help to relieve the guilt either.
There’s a universal answer for all compulsive behaviors “Just Stop!”
Well who doesn't know that? As every person with an addictive behavior, or any parent, sibling or partner will tell you, it’s not that simple.
And even when there’s long term sobriety or the compulsive behavior is under control, there can be always be a relapse. This is devastating and demoralizing – It's defeating for everyone involved. So what to do?
How do you keep up your spirits? How can you not lose faith and keep soldiering on.
I hope that questions of others can be helpful for you, and if you're really fed up with your situation and would like to speak to me about what to do, talk to me about a free 1/2 consultation.
What Other Visitors Have Said
Click below to see contributions from other visitors to this page...
Fiancee Ended It While In Rehab
Hello,
I
am completely heart broken and hope you can give me some answers. I
have been with my fiancee for almost 4 yrs. We have a 2yr old and 4yr
old.
…
How can I set boundaries with my sister?
Dear
Bev,
Though I grew up in an alcohol-saturated, alcoholic-dominated family,
I've managed to escape the trap of alcoholism - as have my only two
…
Would this be enabling?
After
a lot of efforts to get compliance from my daughter who is an alcoholic
(26 years-old) the court has given me kinship custody of my 4 month-old
grandson.
…
Concern About Grandchildren
My
husband and I currently live in the same small neighborhood with my
grown daughter, her son and my son, his wife and 2 little girls.
My son, daughter-in-law
…
Crystal Methamphetamine
What is the origin and original purpose of this drug?
-------------------------------------------------
The following is the latest information
…
Abusive Relationship Continues
I
went from a home, where I was emotionally abused by my father, to a
home with an emotionally abusive husband. I never could have realized
it, but my
…
Alcoholic/ Gambling Wife
My wife drinks and gambles. It is effecting our relationship. What advise can you give me?
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…
Pub Owner & Alcoholic
I am a landlord of a pub. I can wait all day before drinking until around 6pm, then the urges come.
Mid-week is the worst because it is quiet in the
…
Disclosing A Heroin Addiction
I have found a girl I really like and I think she likes me but I am
worried that when I tell her I am a recovering heroin addict and that I
am on a methadone
…
Alcohol Rehab & More Insanity
My
son-in-law (a physician!) returned from 3 months in rehab for addiction
(wine) 2 months ago. We had high hopes that the whole situation would
be improved.
…
Codependent in Everything
So, I think I'm probably acting codependent in many facets of my life--my job, my friendships, my romantic relationship.
There's often a contradiction
…
Family Estrangement
My family does not have healthy ways to communicate and express anger or disappointment.
This results in a repeating pattern of family members refusing
…
Porn Addiction & A Teen Girl
I am a 16 year old girl dealing with porn addiction alone.
I have no one to talk to except online or by text. It started in fifth grade and went
My Son's addiction to alcohol
My son is addicted to alcohol. In the last few years he has been in and
out of jail. When he is not drinking he is a wonderful, talented
individual
…
14 year old Girl and Weed
Everyone around me smokes weed and always has --my parents, my aunts, uncles even cousins and their partners!!
I always said I would NEVER smoke
…
Addicted to online psychics, spiritual advisors
How do I stop this financially consuming habit of consulting online psychic or spiritual advisors?
I have tried to cancel my accounts, and credit
…
My husband is alcoholic, gambler, sex and drug addict.
I really don't know what to do. My husband is an alcoholic, a compulsive
gambler, a sex addict who likes to have sex with different women – at
least
…
How Can I Get My Boyfriend Help?
I am going into a very intensive treatment program (6 – 9 months) for mothers in recovery.
We have been abusing drugs and alcohol together every week
…
I'm Codependent --It's Driving Me Crazy!!
My girlfriend and I have been together for a year and a half, and living together for a year.
She has PMDD and OCD and I am codependent. I spend
…
Emotional Eating
My best friend can't stop spending her money on her obsession with food. She has gained 45 lbs in 3 months.
She now gives me ALL her credit cards,
…
Weed vs. Marijuana
What is the difference between weed and marijuana?
When I smoke, often feel like my stomach is gassy.
What is better for your health, marijuana or weed?
Khat Adiction
How do I stop khat addiction? It is beginning to destroy my whole life.
My boyfriend is also doing it and we both need help urgently. But we have
Codependant and Abusive Relationship
I am in an abusive relationship, and I'm pretty sure that I’ m
codependent, because I set boundaries, but don’t stick to them. Then I
feel resentful
My Husband's Affair
My husband and I have been married for 20 yrs and have
known each other since high school (sweet hearts). However things
have been bad for the last
…
Shoplifting Addiction
I am a 54 yrs old woman with an addiction to shoplifting.
I have 15 previous charges and 3 pending charges. I am depressed, have anxiety and panic attacks
…
Should I Report An Alcoholic?"
What should I do when I know that alcoholic is putting himself and other people at risk?
Should I report him to the police knowing he is driving home
Stuck in a relationship.... can't focus on my life
I'm 32 years old and I've been in a relationship, for almost two years.
I'm going through a break up and my mind is working non-stop. It's not clear
What About Addictive Thinking?
Can a person get rid of addictive, unhealthy thoughts by simply replacing them with healthier ones?
The main problem is that I do this negative thinking
…
Is this a Pornography Addiction
My
wife thinks I have an addiction to porn. I do not believe I do. I have
not looked or viewed pornography for 4 years and back then I looked
online for
…
Enabling My Husband
I have been separated from my husband for two years and he has become homeless.
How do I help, but not continue enabling his behavior which landed
Beginning Recovery at 17
My 17 yr old son is 19 days into recovery from his addiction to pills.
He is in rehab and the counselors are complaining he is not getting with the
…
Computer Sex Addiction
Why does he do it? I sleep next to him in the nude every night and he sneaks up at 4 am every morning to chat and look at porn.
He's 62 and I'm 52
…
Alcohol Addiction
My
boyfriend is a alcoholic. He is cutting down for me, But he always bugs
me for 1 beer and when I let him have 1 beer he is a different person.
But
…
How to stop
How can you progress one step at a time to stop the addiction?
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If you're talking about drugs
…
HORRIBLE SECRET!!!
I've been holding back a very horrible secret.
One of my neighbors is a single parent with a little girl 8yrs old now.
He is a drug addict (Various
…
Dealing with Gambling and Alcohol Addict
My father is addicted to drinking and in the past few years gambling as
well. My mom, sister and I intervened when we found out the finances
were out
…
Alcoholic Child
Our adult son, in his twenties, has had drug and alcohol issues’ for
which he sought help independently from us. He held a job and confined
most drinking
…
Daily Addiction Quotes
Is there a calendar anywhere with daily quotes or short stories about addiction.
I think it would be a great tool to wake up and get through the day.
…
How To Help My Bro
I think my brother might have a really strong addictive personality for
smoking and women. He falls ‘unthoughtfully’ for women and continues to
do radical
…
Cheating With A Married Man
I have been in a relatively new relationship with a women who is very kind, intelligent and caring.
She recently told me that she was in a relationship
…
Binge Drinking and Flu
I'm an 18 year old girl and I binged drank for over a week. I stopped yesterday.
I feel very sick, cold and tired and I feel that I'm coming down
…
Gambling to Make Money
I am 30 weeks pregnant and my boyfriend keeps going to the casino to "make money for the baby".
He goes up at noon one day and doesn’t come back until
…
Adictive behavior & Sober 8 Years
How do you stop behaving like an addict even though it's been years since I’ve used?
I isolate, need to control my environment, and other things --
…
Tough Love Help
My
son is 23 yrs old. He has not paid his rent, is homeless, jobless and I
am in my 1st yr of recovery from alcohol and other abusive situations.
He
…
On-line Shopping -- a reward for hard work
I work as an engineer and work hard.
After a full working day, I want to reward myself by buying online (mostly) or any thing I saw before.
This
…
Non-Alcohol Beer & Gambling
I am a compulsive gambler. I’ve been out of treatment for 18 months now and I’m still clean from gambling and drinking.
Lately I have been taking
…
Marijuana & court
I’m a first year university student from New York.
This summer I got caught stealing $8. worth of candy from a grocery store and went to county jail
…
Can an alcoholic take a drink?
I had a serious drinking problem for several years. This eventually led to a 10-day hospital detox and a six month rehab.
After 18 months with no
…
My boyfriend -- The Alcoholic/Addict
My boyfriend is addicted to alcohol and weed.
He's stolen money for alcohol and drugs and he got sent to court for it. If he does it again then he
…
Codepency Support Group Information
I was wondering if you know or organize any codenpency support groups in Montreal, in English.
Thank you
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…
Friend in Recovery & How To Move Out
At the end of 2009 I met a wonderful young lady. From the onset I sensed
there might be some issues with her, but there was something about her
that
Results of CBT and Addiction
What is the result of cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) when it comes to treating an addict?
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What to eat to prevent cravings?
My boyfriend is a recovering substance abuser and is clean for the past 6 months, but the cravings are back on and off.
How can I change his diet
…
Daughter's Shopping Addiction
My daughter is 17 and seems to have a shopping problem. It has gone on
for several years but seems much worse now. What should I do?
-----------------------------
Do I Have Bulimia
I'm worried I may be bulimic.
For the past year, I've been vomiting up close to every supper I've eaten. On the weekends, I'll panic and binge on junk
…
Casino Theme At The Prom
What is your opinion of having a high school Jr/Sr. prom with a casino
theme, where the students play card games and win prizes?
--------------------------------
…
Cannabis, Alcohol Addiction & My Son
I am the mother of a 25 year old lad who is addicted to cannabis and alcohol.
He has taken cannabis since the age of 15 and probably drank as well
…
Smoking weed -- How to get them to quit?
My
partner is a strong user of weed and doesn't think he is addicted. He
said he can stop at any time but when he does he wants to do it all the
time --
…
How long are the effects of Meth?
I have been clean for 5 months....and yet I am experiencing constant tingling
and pain of the outer extremities. The tingling of my nerves are worse when
…
Hi dose of Nalbuphine injections
I can’t stop it. I am using IV for about 4 years now. I can’t tell anyone. How can I end it without anyone knowing?
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Sex with Mom Addication
I am a 23 yr old male. I don’t know why, but I like incest sex.
I like to read mom/son sex stories. I can’t stop doing this.
Due to this, I think
…
Chronic alcoholic -- what to do?
After multiple interventions for a 67 year old chronic alcoholic he recently has gone on another binge.
The longest he has been sober is 2 years
…
Codependency & Conversation
I am still working through my codependency after three years of therapy.
I have been able to let go of controlling behaviors reasonably well and
…
Weed
I've only smoked weed once and will never do it again. Should I feel better soon??
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The effects
…
We Are Just Alike
Can
two people who are codependent with a sex addiction and both OCD, have a
healthy relationship? We have so much in common. We like the same
music, food,
Should we work on our codependent relationship?
Is it EVER possible to remain in the relationship and stop the codependent cycle?
If we both acknowledge the problem, try to come up with a game
…
What is a weight addict?
So how exactly do you know you’re addicted to something?
I'm not sure if I'm addicted to weight loss. I'm obsessed I think, but aren't we all just
…
Why is there silence around alcoholism?
I am a grown adult who lived with an alcoholic father for 18 years. I
just have one question -- Why was there such silence in our home?
Our parents
What are the effects of speed?
What are the signs that someone is addicted to speed?
---------------------------------------------------
Here are both the long term and short term
…
Bath Salts and PCPs?
I am on probation and I dropped dirty for PCP.
I have never seen nor did I know it even existed anymore.
I have been doing bath salts. Does this
…
Anorexia
I really need help.
I think may be in the early stages of anorexia. I have many of the
symptoms, eg coldness, fear of gaining weight, hair all over
…
Shoplifting and a Record
What
if you get caught shoplifting twice and they only just fined you. Would
you get a criminal record because you've done it twice?
------------------------------
…
Should I work on a relationship with a codependent?
I am a recovering alcoholic – last drink 9-10-87. I have worked hard at staying sober each day.
I got myself in this relationship – almost 2 years ago
…
Help for Compulsive Shoplifting & Sex Addiction
Do you have any recommendations for treatment resources for compulsive shoplifting and sex addiction in the Toronto area?
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…
Relationships, Sex, Drugs, Food, Smoking and Drinking
I am a 27year old woman and these are all problems I face -- if it's not one it's the other.
I have experienced a lot in my life -- from a drug-addicted
Is This Man Codependent?
Is it considered co-dependent when a man has been engaged 3 times with 3 different women in a 3 1/2 year time span?
This certain man gets engaged
…
Gambling On Machines
I
am addicted to gambling on machines. I am a 23yr old university student
and not working. I cannot afford to pay for help, but I need to stop
gambling.
…
Sex addiction
I get attracted to sex time after time. I control myself not do this, but after 2-3 days I do it.
Please help.
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Alcoholism Transfering To Food
My alcoholic son is not drinking but obsessing on and consuming lots of food. What can I do?
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Who Can Help Me With Pot??
I have a compulsive addiction to cannabis and it's ruining my life!
I have been to see the doctor who referred me to a counselor, who told me I was
Can't Stop Shoplifting
I am a shoplifter. I can't seem to stop. What can I do?
----------------------------------------------------
Like any other compulsive behavior,
Drug Addiction and Meetings
My husband is a drug addict and he goes to meetings.
Lately his meetings seem like more of a social event than recovery. He goes to a meeting from
Gambling Addiction
What starts gambling?
-----------------------------------------------------------
In men, compulsive gambling usually starts in the early
Magic Mushrooms & Pancreas
I drank a cup of shroom tea made with 7g. I have been nauseous for 5 days now.
Saw the doctor yesterday and she said some hormone from my pancreas
Addiction Counselor Training
My past had been corrupted with alcohol and drugs, inevitably led to criminal charges leaving me with a criminal record.
Now that I have been clean
Codependent relationship? Is There Hope Or Should I Walk Away
I am 48 years old woman and I am sitting here with a black eye.
My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over a year. He has left me 3 times
Pornography Addiction
How do you know if you have a pornography addiction-- other than it just being a man thing. ie: visual stimulation?
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…
Alcoholism As A Way Of Life
I
am looking for any research-based information on the phenomenon of
alcoholism as a way of life across generations, in a seemingly
functional upper middle
…
Crystal Meth
What are short term affects of crystal meth?
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
These effects were on
Enabling Problem
I don't know the difference between helping and enabling.
I get caught off guard all the time. How can I be a good supportive parent, willing to
…
Please help me
Within
the past year and a half I started binge drinking and smoking a lot of
marijuana. I have an addictive personality and I have lost the respect
of
Stopping Food Addiction
I'm
only 19 years old and I've been struggling with food addiction and body
image for years. I need this to stop. How can I do this? Help!
------------------------
…
The addiction is back. Was it ever truly gone?
I've
been smoking Ice for 6 years now. It started as it always does-- just
on weekends, then Monday morning, just to get to work and before I knew
it,
…
Can't Stop Shoplifting
I am a compulsive shoplifter and I can't seem to stop.
I want to change my thinking but again I just go up against a brick wall. I go through withdrawals
…
Rehab for Weed
If I am going to rehab to stop smoking weed, will I have to quit taking the narcotics I am prescribed?
---------------------------------------------
…
Can an Eating Disorder Help Me?
I'm thinking about starting to have an eating disorder to feel better about myself.
I know I shouldn't do it, but I feel so bad about myself, that
Procrastination & Binge Drinking.
I
planned to work on projects over the weekend but this seemed to take
second place to a desire to drink and do addictive behaviors.
It seems avoidance
Am I Enabling??
I have a grown daughter who has a baby. She's a drug addict and is currently attending a Methadone clinic 2 hours away.
She's separated from her husband,
…
Help for Partner's Sexual Addiction
About
a year ago I discovered that my long-time boyfriend had been sleeping
with innumerable different women. He promised, swore, that "we would
work
Getting off Methadone
I have been on between 180mg to 200mg of methadone and want to get off. What is the best way to go about this?
-------------------------------------------
Binge drinking
I
am 45, female and an alcoholic. But I never drank every day. I can go
days, weeks and even months without drinking and then something
triggers me and
…
Am I Addicted to Pot?
I'm a 16 year old girl and I've only smoked weed 4 times in my life
(and that's 4 times in about 7 months, so I wasn't a frequent user)
I never,
…
How can we get son into treatment?
We have a 32 year old son who says he occasionally smokes marijuana, but
and we are seeing all the signs of addiction: his attitude, lack of
sleep, mood
…
Is my boyfriend an alcoholic?
My boyfriend and I separated about three months ago because of some issues we were having, including his drinking habits.
I've already divorced an
Alcohol Addiction
I know a girl who is dependent on alcohol.
When she wakes up she has some beer. Then when she is finished with work she has more and drinks before
…
Moderated Drinking
My
boyfriend just moved out after promising to go to rehab to salvage our
relationship. I asked him to not drink before going but he went on a
huge bender
…
Alcohol
My husband denies having a drinking problem yet, he drinks anywhere from 2-5 twelve packs of beer a week.
When I confront him about it and ask him
…
Drinking husband
I am an alcoholic and I’ve been trying to stop binge drinking for 15 years.
My husband is also an alcoholic, but he won’t stop. He hides beer all
…
Psychic Power
I am a 47yr old woman in a long distance relationship for 1yr.
My boyfriend thinks I’ve been cheating on him. First , it was his neighbor. He thought
…
Codependent Relationship???
I
don't know how my relationship with my husband got this way. I used to
be so confident and independent, but now I feel as if I am not living
my own
Am I Codependent?
I’m
a 38 years old man and I have been going out with a woman for 16
months. She means a lot to me. I don’t remember feeling like this with
anyone else
Am I Weak-Willed or an Alcoholic?
I'm 24 years old woman and I think I may be an alcoholic.
When I'm sober I don't have obsessive thoughts about drinking or feel a NEED to drink. But,
Why Quit Marijuana Addiction
Sometimes
I wonder whether or not I'm addicted to weed. I smoke a lot.
Currently, I haven't smoked in awhile -- I don't really know how long,
because
My Husband is an Alcoholic.
My husband drinks everyday and when he grew up, both his parents were drunk almost daily.
I do not want our kids to grow up in the same kind of household.
…
Adderall Addiction
I have developed an addiction to Adderall and I really want to end my addiction problem.
My doctor prescribed Adderall to help with my depression a
…
Marijuana and your lungs
My husband has smoked marijuana for 38 years. He has a horrible cough and in the mornings he coughs up green phlegm.
He does not smoke a whole joint
What are the 12 steps?
What are the first steps?
I am fine when I drink beer however, when I drink anything else, I drink till I fall over.
This has become progressively
Enabling an Alcoholic
I
moved in with my boy friend six months ago. He has an alcoholic
daughter (age 26) and at the time, he never mentioned that she might
have to live with
…
Living With Addiction
My step-son has been in and out of trouble for most of his life.
He has been in jail, rehab, gone through a divorce, gotten a DUI and lost custody
Addict Boyfriend Moves In
My
addict (alcohol/marijuana) boyfriend claims to be trying to quit. He is
going to anger management but he's not in a 12 step program.
His house will
Addiction, Suicide & Holidays
I have a brother who is 26 and has been suffering alcoholism for about 5 years now. It began when his father died.
I have tried everything to help
About Addiction to Alcohol
How
do I help my boyfriend? He used to drink every day with his previous
girlfriend and his life was miserable with her. When we started dating, I
told …
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